Improvise, adapt, and overcome...and shit.

So no shit there I was….trying to get into the armory.

A week or so ago I headed into work and needed to get into our armory. The outer perimeter fence is secured via an mk1 mod o lock big ass 1 each. It had been raining like a champ for a few days prior and the temp dropped rapidly overnight  coating everything in a few inches of ice…which pretty much fuckin rocks.

I skate across the ice from my truck to the fence and find the lock mechanism frozen out like a married man’s sex life…FUCKINGREAT (that’s a word by the way).

As I contemplate vehicle breaching the gate and or cutting holes through the wire like a VC sapper in WW NAM I start digging through my truck looking for ways to get the lock open.

I carry a fairly large vehicle survival kit in my truck in a filson bag (It’s a satchel…Indiana Jones has one). Contained within that survival kit I have several ways to get a fire going, amongst them a lighter/flint and steel/9v battery and steel wool/and some of these bad boys http://www.fast-fire.com/index.php?p=products&prod=7  the SOLKOA fastfire tinder’s. Now before we continue…yes I am trained in wilderness survival and can get a fire going with a bow and drill…you should learn this as well for a longer life, that being said…sometimes the easy route is the best route.

Hmmm…FIRE. \m/

Out come the fastfire tinder’s and the lighter (It was too delicate an operation for flint and steel as I had to position the tinder on top of the lock and couldn’t disturb it without knocking the tinder off the lock).

A few frozen fingered moments later and I had ….wait for it……wait for it…..wa FIRE! I let it burn for about 15 seconds which melted the ice out of the lock and whammo… access to the giggle cage.

Not its intended use but it got the job done. I need to order some more as I’m down currently down to my last one….which of course meant that a few days ago I had the EXACT SAME PROBLEM and our maintenance department didn’t have any lock de-icer…so I fucked around…and fucked around….and finally just got pissed off and beat the shit out of the lock with an etool (Folding shovel) until the ice broke up enough to allow the lock mechanism to turn and unlock.

You see being  down to my last fire starter meant that if I had used it Murphy would have ass raped me on the way home and I would have needed that to get a warming fire going after center punching a unicorn on the highway and freezing to death in the cold….or something.

Moral of the story…buy some of these things as they can literally save your ass, and also an etool ;). I also own the Suma container which has several uses and I had one of the grip S kits but broke it in about 3 seconds…story of my life. This stuff is all made by SOLKOA, a personnel recovery/SERE training outfit and is good to go. Check them out.

In other news, stay tuned for some updates to 4:1 products which should be available soon, as well as some pretty awesome MG related stuff I’m working R&D on. Thanks for reading folks.

\m/

Velcro...and the DCOD (Downstairs closet of death)

I messed around with this several years ago while i was still in Bosnia and am bringing sticky back!
(Not that you fuckin pervs).

Anyway...with the modern trends in trying to lighten the load of our warfighters with everything from lighter kit to guns you may find this useful.

One of the most awesome inventions for use in our world (Ranks right up there with  550 cord/riggers tape/and two ham slices and an applesauce) is adhesive backed velcro. Before it got cool to stick shit to our helmets with it, a lot of us used it all over our vehicles to secure navigation and comms equipment and the like. I had a gangster ass velcro copenhagen spitter in one of our guntrucks for a while \m/. EATADIK Sadr City.

In case you are slow...its fuckin velcro that sicks to shit...that you put on gear to stick to other shit with velcro on it...and shit.

Works like a champ.

This particular post is about securing rifle magazines. For those of you running go bags and the like lined with velcro...this is a pretty good way to keep your mags from sliding all over in your bag. You can run your mags inside your kit without having to buy extra mag pouches and the like...further reducing weight.

I am currently running mine on my Down Range Gear velcro pull out sleeve thingymobobber which works well for me when i cant have a gun on body (Apparently there are people afraid of guns and shit in the states).

Anyway its been good to go so far. Try it out if it works for you. Keep in mind this is good for that use but probably not secure enough to stick to the front of your plate carrier and get your FISH on.

Oh and in case you were wondering...no i dont use G.I. mags anymore due to PMAGS being the poo but had one laying around to demo for those poor bastards still using those things.

KILL BABIES!

The worlds first ITAR controlled ice chest

Yeah,,,you read that right.

So a few weeks back i had an epiphany (No i wasnt taking a shit)...what options does the modern warfighter/contractor/...dove hunter in shall we say "Restricted" areas have for smuggling tasty beverages into non-permissive environments? The answer you may ask is NONE as cool as the item you are about to read about.

Due to modern warfare/protection details being run by puritans who have outlawed sex and drinking in theater...the crafty fella that wants to unwind after a day of curbstomping the shit out of bad guys souls has to be a sneaky bastard in order to get around General Order numero uno.

...and thus, the 4:1 Consulting Modular MK1 stealth chest was born.

This hand crafted piece of low profile finery is now available for purchase in CONUS/and can be shipped to APO's to get around those pesky health and comfort inspections (A hide in plain sight version with a reflective belt is in the works for troops so dont shit yourselves if you need one for your hooch).

Like most pieces of equipment i use/am designing they have multiple uses...and this bad motherfucker is no different.

NOT ONLY does it keep your tasty beverages cold but, it has several other built in/reconfigurable features necessary for the modern combative closet drinker.

1.) Its totally covered in KRYTANIUM! (TM)/Patent Pending... a durable sprayed on finish in use for years with cool dudes to provide a custom camoflauge solution for items with as issued target indicator colors. We sell only the "Guaranteed to cause cancer" by the state of Kalifornia marked versions of KRYTANIUM! (TM)/Patent pending....The colors can be rapidly reconfigured for operations in any theater.

2.) Its covered in totally badass 3d leafy camo and netting with untreated ghillie burlap (We left it untreated so you can light the chest on fire and use it to destroy enemy light armored vehicles and or democrats if pursued). Sticking with the effective camo scheme (breaking up shine/outline/and contrast with the background) we used just enough glued on netting in order to allow the user to attach local veg to more effectively blend in with his environment.

3.) Velcro...its got fucking velcro. Usefull for sticking stuff to said chest. Note: We DO NOT suggest sticking any gay morale patches or unit identifiers onto said velcro...for obvious reasons...i mean how embarassing would it be to identify your unit on the invasion of Pakistan and Iran and offend those we are there to conquer by leaving a chest full of non Halal items?

We DO suggest sticking one of our soon to be released TQ holders to the velcro because it puts money in our pockets and provides you with a lifesaving tool in the event that you need to roll to a gunfight while hammered (Yes this has happened before...shit you not...Iraqi's suck at fighting so bad they got their asses kicked by a bunch of drunk American pipehitters..plus the Swedish babes on top of the med center were in very secure hands as well). You can also stick any other modular velcro items to said velcro...we use IR glint tape in ours so if we have to unass the AO while drinking we can find the stash later on once the situation has calmed down.

4.) Asymetric (Asymetric is the new "Tactical") Shock cord retention lanyard/Budweiser line/autoerotic asphyxiation trainer/Soon to be DEAD hooker restraint device (You can also use the chest for humping out dead midget hookers during cross border/cant landnav ops). ..Leave no trace... ;)

5.) Interior Signals devices, the inside of the 4:1 Consulting modular tactical stealth chest MK1 has 3 redundant means of signaling/IFF (Have to let the Air Force broads know where the parties at if you get my drift).
 a.) Fuckin IR strobe
 b.) Fuckin IR GLINT tape
 c.) Fuckin cool as shit survival bandanna in bright as fuck orange (VS-17 panels are soooo..OIF 1)

What this provides you is a way to let the boys/AF chicks equipped with NODS/NVG's know its time to pound brews and shoot machine guns on Peyote, IR GLINT tape for the same reason or for relocating the chest if placed in a cache/Letting the guys in the birds know not to smokecheck you with 30MM....and last but not least the baller ass survival bandanna secured in the tactical waterproofing bag. This last item is loaded with usefull navigation/survival knowledge and can be used as a field expedient roll of asswipe in an emergency beer shits situation.

The non target indicator colored riggers tape used to secure the signalling items inside the chest make a handy addition to your rape kit and when used in conjunction with the survival rag..turn that NO/NO/NO...into HMMM/HMMM/HMMM with a QUICKNESS.

Once done embracing the hate you can use the chest to cool MG barrels.

So there you have it folks...the Stealth Chest for the modern warfighter. Contact us to get yours today. We are already working on a SWAT version in black but the donuts keep getting wet, and a custom ballistic rated version.

Field testing is going well.

Being the blood crazed storm troopers we are...we wouldnt really know...but we hear the stealth chest also works well while dove hunting as the white lid was causing birds to flare...not that "Those guys" were drinking a few tasty beverages while hunting or anything...that shits unsafe and probably illegal but whatever.

Oh yeah...it also fucking levitates and shit

 Shit almost fuckin forgot the most important feature of all. Its lined with freshly slaughtered padded virgin unicorn vagina lips in a non berry ammendment compliant sweatshop (We have a bro who supplies us with fresh slave labor straight from the diamond mines in Africa so we can keep the end user cost down).

Merica!

 

Apparently the fuckin zompocalypse is going to start in PA (switched on readers already know this as the original night of the living dead was filmed like 10 minutes from our training center).

So no shit, there I was….building the most tactical icechest anyone has ever seen (Standby for another blog post on its construction here soon) when a hurricane/tornado…whatever the hell it was decided to blow through here.

Naturally this decided to happen right in the middle of cooking dinner which being a batchelor meant heating up hotdogs in the microwave.

Rain blew in sideways, trees fell over and were murdered with chainsaws, the roof of our shoothouse at work blew off, Porta shitters went flying through the great grey yonder and of course the power went off.

Now if this had happened back at COP 4:1 in Montana this wouldn’t have even bothered me…but being in western PA currently melting machine gun barrels and crashing cars it was a minor pain in the ass. I have enough ammo/guns/med gear/water and food/fuel etc to ride out a pretty major event here but being single im a bit short on creature comforts…like lanterns and lights not powered by 123’s and attached to guns…

So…basically 30 seconds into this 45 minute ass kicker of a storm at the same time the road was flashflooding and I was dreading trees going sideways through my  truck I decided it was time to break into the zompocalypse stash and bust out my cool as shit Candle lantern.

This thing is ideal for situations such as this. While it doesn’t light up a whole house it puts out a very usable amount of light for its size. Works great for camping trips in tents (chopping up dead hookers) and the like as well.

Power/lights were only out for a little over an hour here but it made life a bit more bearable. One thing I realized I needed is to get a battery powered lantern for situations such as these and I will head to china-mart and the local sporting goods store tomorrow to pick one up.

Anyway, get yourself one of these little deals from Austere Provisions Company here

http://www.austereprovisions.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=UCO%2DCANDLELIER%2DVALU

Kill Babies!

It smells like oranges...and victory!

I have been a machine gun armorer for a while now and have recently taken over the armorer duties at work as our full time guy bounced and is currently in vetting for an overseas gig. I dont really mind this as i enjoy wrenching on guns.

While i certainly dont have as much time wrenching on guns as a lot of guys do i do have a lot of time carrying them for a living, and teaching their use. Over the years i have learned some things...mostly that the way i was originally taught to clean weapons was a complete waste of time and actually contributed to wearing them out faster.

Most quality firearms will run with no cleaning as long as you keep them wet with quality lube. Once they do get sluggish its time to bust out the cleaning gear and get to work.

The last few days i have been dicking around in the armory trying to get stuff organized and clean and repair stuff that needs it.

Our schoolhouse 240's and 249's have seen some major rounds without cleaning (Live and blank) and are starting to show it.

A few years ago i got turned onto the SLIP family of products through Pat Rogers of EAG Tactical. I have used just about everything on the market and this is THE stuff. All the products in the line work together to clean/lube/and make follow on cleaning much,much easier.

I use SLIP 2000 Extreme weapons lubricant on everything from handguns to big bore precision rifles. It works especially well on light and medium machine guns. Most lubes will burn off fairly quickly when run through belt fed weapons but SLIP EWL tends to last longer than most.

The entire product line is non toxic/non hazmat and as such you can have it shipped to your APO downrange. ....giggitty....


For cleaning i use the 725 cleaner/degreaser and the carbon killer. The 725 works well for minor stuff but the carbon killer straight makes baked on carbon its bitch as im about to show you.

One of the dirtiest parts of both the 240/249 are the gas system plugs (Newer 249's dont have these anymore) and they are required to be reasonably clean to function.

Attached are a series of photos both pre and post cleaning. These are the spare barrels as well, they are cleaner than the barrels on the gun that i got yesterday.

I hosed everything down with 725...let sit for a minute and wiped off, removed the gas cylinder plugs from the M240B barrels and let them sit in the carbon killer for 10 minutes. I then used an AP brush (Toothbrush) to scrub as much of the crap off as i could and punched the bores with a 1 piece cleaning rod with carbon killer. Next i dried off and relubed with Slip EWL. Good to go. Elapsed time was about 15 minutes per barrel.

Pre cleaning

post cleaning

Another quality product thats out for weapons cleaning is this stuff...works great when you are in a hurry.

Its available from TacStrike on their webstore.

http://tacstrike.com/index.html

Kill Babies!

Med bags and the stuffing there-of

After today’s earthquake shenanigans (Have not been through one of those in a while) I decided to take stock of my emergency supplies. Weapons/ammo/kit/chow and water I checked a few weeks ago so pulled out my house and truck med bags to check them out.

A few words and pics of my truck Med bag (Rockin the 4:1 consulting Velcro TQ holder \m/ ) will follow.

A lot of us prepared types keep a med bag in our vehicles (as well as having the training and experience to use them)…if you don’t… you need to unfuck yourself. You could be the difference between someone living or dying. I am amazed at the number of instructors of various tactical related subjects who have zero medical skills and or equipment onboard when conducting training but that’s a rant for another day.

As to the bags themselves they don’t have to be fancy, if you are on a budget a few simple pieces of med gear tossed in a zip lock bag will do. I am currently using the ATS Tactical gear FRB med bag and like it…although it’s going to get sent off here soon to have some mods made to it to work better for me.

1 piece of advice…everything you throw in your bag needs to be waterproofed, having had several hundred dollars of medical gear destroyed when my pack soaked through once in a rainstorm I learned that lesson the hard way…again Ziplocs for the win.

I am a former EMT-B with combat lifesaver training and spent a little time while deployed as my team’s backup medic when our 18D trained guys were on leave so I keep my bag tailored to my level of training and abilities. I am not going to get into why I carry each piece of gear in my kit, but I am sufficiently trained and have used every single piece of equipment I carry in the real world.

I like to break my med bags down into “Sections” if you will for ease of finding stuff in the dark. Note; I need to find a decent headlamp and throw it in my kit.

My bag is broken down as follows.

Signal

VS17 panel+IR and white light strobe.

On outside of bag I keep a half roll of riggers tape on the waist belt + a SOF TQ in one of the 4:1 Velcro TQ holders I make and sell.

Inside bottom zippered pouch of bag I keep my taped together Splinting kit consisting of

X3 finger splints

X1 Sam splint

X1 cravat

X2 space blankets

X1 Coflex roll

Inside main pouch of bag I keep 2 Oales modular bandages for easy access, my bleeder kit consists of the following.

X1 SOF TQ secured with another of my Velcro TQ holders

X3 rolls of H+H compressed gauze

X3 rolls Kerlix gauze

X5 Combine ABD pads

X2 Quick clot combat gauze

X2 ActCel Hemostatic gauze

Airway kit

X3 Asherman chest seals

X2 14 gauge angiocaths for NCD

X3 H+H wound seal kits

Also my boo-boo kit consisting of moleskin/band aids/oral rehydration salts

Another Ziploc contains my BSI kit with non-latex gloves/beta dine and iodine prep pads/hand sanitizer

1 roll of athletic tape and 2 spare pistol mags.

This kit is setup to allow me to treat mostly trauma/minor injuries while out and about or on the range, and is either in my truck or stuffed/lashed to the top of my pack while out trying to shoot critters in the face or general woods bumming. Works for me.

The FRB bag is available from ATS Tactical gear here...
http://www.atstacticalgear.com/cgi/commerce.cgi?preadd=action&key=ST-13342

S/F

Money saving tip of the day...dont throw out your old kydex (Its easier to work than you think). Only thing you need is a heat source/multitool or your old lady's salad tong ;)  to hold/bend/shape the item and a few seconds of your time.

 I have managed to break EVERY single kydex holster and magazine pouch i have ever used with the exception of these.

These are by far the best and longest lasting kydex items i have used and have no screws or attaching hardware to break.They are made by a company called Ready Tactical and i purchased these through SKD tactical (GREAT company by the way).

 I have these two 1911 pouches and also 2 Glock 19 pouches. I bought them in 2006 IIRC and they have seen constant use since then in both Iraq and here stateside.
They have started to loosen up as of late so today i fired up the kitchen stove and rebent them for better purchase. Worked like a champ..and im very surprised how easy it was to work the kydex...hmmm i may have to play around with this Kydex a bit more.